This chapter was interesting in that I always want my kids to be self-reliant. A lot of the things Dyer discusses are things that we do with our kids anyway. I have to admit that I am an approval seeker because I think when I was small that is how I got attention. In my family I still seek their approval and usually don't get it. I have learned over the years that seeking approval gets you no where. Thus, I am trying to help my kids to get over that approval thing. My oldest, Autumn, does fine with this and we usually discuss the problems she has and I reassure her that she should just be herself and stick to what she believes regardless of everyone else. My middle child, Jacob has trouble with this and is a terrible approval seeker. I am trying to wean him away from this but it is very frustrating. My littlest one, I have been really aware of the little things..ie. spilled milk, I try not to get angry but just clean it up and sometimes include him in the process. I truly believe that we all need to make sure our kids don't blame others for their problems.
I agree with Dyer most in this chapter...as I have figured these things out for myself and try to help my kids find that they have the power within themselves. Don't go looking for something that is right inside you.
Wednesday, May 24, 2006
Thursday, May 18, 2006
Blog A book Along: What do I really want for my Children?
Chapter 3: I want my children to be risk takers.
I do want my children to take some risks. Dyer says you don't grow if you don't take risks. I believe this to be true because the times I have taken risks I have learned something or grown is some way. I understand what he means we have to excited and not fearful. It is a scary thing to change something or do something that takes us out of our comfort zone. I think you need to change the fear to excitement. Sort of putting the positive spin on it. After all fear and excitement cause the same bodily reaction..heartrate increases, you sweat, etc....I think it is all in how you use that reaction. Everytime I get fearful I try to turn that into excitement rather than be paralzyed by the fear. The quote" The only thing we have to fear is fear itself" by FDR. I think fear can be the monster under the bed that we tend to not want to deal with but once we do everything is so much better.
The best thing that I got out of this chapter was about Do your best...to be changed to just Do it. I have one child that is a risk taker and one that isn't. I have used everything in my power to get the non risk taker to takes the risk of being wrong which is his biggest fear. Sometimes he does take the risks and I try to be there to let him know that that was a good job to just take the risk but I know he just thinks it is stupid to do things that you fear. Because it is uncomfortable but it is way a to enlarge your world. So I think I will drop the "your best" part and just say "DO"! Because best is very subjective to everyone at different times.
This is a very interesting book in that it is helping me look at my parenting in a different way and it is also verifying to me that I am doing some good things too.
I do want my children to take some risks. Dyer says you don't grow if you don't take risks. I believe this to be true because the times I have taken risks I have learned something or grown is some way. I understand what he means we have to excited and not fearful. It is a scary thing to change something or do something that takes us out of our comfort zone. I think you need to change the fear to excitement. Sort of putting the positive spin on it. After all fear and excitement cause the same bodily reaction..heartrate increases, you sweat, etc....I think it is all in how you use that reaction. Everytime I get fearful I try to turn that into excitement rather than be paralzyed by the fear. The quote" The only thing we have to fear is fear itself" by FDR. I think fear can be the monster under the bed that we tend to not want to deal with but once we do everything is so much better.
The best thing that I got out of this chapter was about Do your best...to be changed to just Do it. I have one child that is a risk taker and one that isn't. I have used everything in my power to get the non risk taker to takes the risk of being wrong which is his biggest fear. Sometimes he does take the risks and I try to be there to let him know that that was a good job to just take the risk but I know he just thinks it is stupid to do things that you fear. Because it is uncomfortable but it is way a to enlarge your world. So I think I will drop the "your best" part and just say "DO"! Because best is very subjective to everyone at different times.
This is a very interesting book in that it is helping me look at my parenting in a different way and it is also verifying to me that I am doing some good things too.
Wednesday, May 10, 2006
Knitting......update.....
This what I have been up to with my knitting. This is the back of my Bristow Cardigan. I have since finished it so that is something. I have started the
left front now.
The next photo is my prayer shawl and I finished this one too. It is very warm and feels nice too. I
am so tired of knitting with LB homespun that I won't be doing that any time soon.The scarf is the Irish hiking scarf for the knitalong. I am not done with that one. I like doing it but I have to do it when I am not going to be bothered to much. I tend to get lost on my count. I did start a lace project Cozy from knitty. But need to concentrate on that one too. I am probably going to start another prayer shawl in Merino knit picks iris color. That is a very easy knit and relaxing. I need to have various projects going to meet my needs. I also am trying to learn socks but that isn't coming along like I hoped.
These are the knit markers I made using directions from
www.wormspit.com/stitchmarkers Very nice......
Well that is all of my projects currently. So yes, I did knit and scrapbook too. Maybe I will get some of that up soon too. Stay posted.....
Blog a book along: Chapter 2
This was more interesting chapter. I so completely understand what he means. My son has low self-esteem. We have done all of things that Mr Dyer describes. Some of these things were hard to do because you have think before you speak. When my dh and I had our first child we decided that we change some of the things that our parents did. Our parents did some things that we didn't like or made us feel good about ourselves so we decided that we wouldn't perpetuate that way.
The first thing we decided was that we would tell our children that we loved them daily. We would also make sure that we disapproved the behavior not the child. Also we would tell our children that they could accomplish anything as along as they gave it their all. So many of Dyer's concepts are not new to me.
I think the reason that my son has such problems is that the daycare provider that I used was not as diligent about watching the speech and such. I also for some reason stopped hugging and kissing my son thinking that it would make him more needy. I know now that was wrong. I do make an effort to hug and kiss him even though he is 11. So he is coming along but it is a long hard road. He has all of the problems that Dyer describes. I think I am going to try the imagery ideas to see if that will make a dent in his ability to succeed. Right now it is hard for him to try new things because he gets frustrated if they aren't perfect right away. So maybe if he can imagine himself succeding it will be a step in the right direction.
Now, my daughter on the other hand, is the a good start on no limit person. She is good at lots of things and just expects that she will be. Not to say that she doesn't try new things but she does get discouraged sometimes but she doesn't let that stop her. Maybe she will be the first no limit person I meet.....
The first thing we decided was that we would tell our children that we loved them daily. We would also make sure that we disapproved the behavior not the child. Also we would tell our children that they could accomplish anything as along as they gave it their all. So many of Dyer's concepts are not new to me.
I think the reason that my son has such problems is that the daycare provider that I used was not as diligent about watching the speech and such. I also for some reason stopped hugging and kissing my son thinking that it would make him more needy. I know now that was wrong. I do make an effort to hug and kiss him even though he is 11. So he is coming along but it is a long hard road. He has all of the problems that Dyer describes. I think I am going to try the imagery ideas to see if that will make a dent in his ability to succeed. Right now it is hard for him to try new things because he gets frustrated if they aren't perfect right away. So maybe if he can imagine himself succeding it will be a step in the right direction.
Now, my daughter on the other hand, is the a good start on no limit person. She is good at lots of things and just expects that she will be. Not to say that she doesn't try new things but she does get discouraged sometimes but she doesn't let that stop her. Maybe she will be the first no limit person I meet.....
Friday, May 05, 2006
Secret Pal 8
1. What is/are your favorite yarn/s to knit with? What fibers do you absolutely *not* like? I like anything that is soft that could be acrylic or natural fiber. I don't like anything scratchy.
2. What do you use to store your needles/hooks in? I use my mother's old knitting case. It looks like a bottle container .
3. How long have you been knitting? I have only been knitting a little over the year. Would you consider your skill level to be beginner, intermediate or advanced? I am a beginner but I will try anything.
4. Do you have an Amazon or other online wish list? http://www.amazon.com/gp/registry/wishlist/ref=yourlists_pop_1/102-7439220-0178514
5. What's your favorite scent? (for candles, bath products etc.) I love anything citrusy. My two favorites are cucumber melon and pink grapefruit.
6. Do you have a sweet tooth?Yes... Favorite candy? Caramel or toffee anything with those two things in them are my faves.
7. What other crafts or Do-It-Yourself things do you like to do?I also scrapbook and make cards. Do you spin? Yes, I am learning to spin with a spindle.
8. What kind of music do you like?I like anything except rap. Can your computer/stereo play MP3s? (if your buddy wants to make you a CD) Yes my music devices with play anything.
9. What's your favorite color? I don't really have a favorite color
Or--do you have a color family/season/palette you prefer? I tend to like any blues or greens or pinks.Any colors you just can't stand? no
10. What is your family situation?I am married and have 3 kids (dd-14, ds -11, ds-3) Do you have any pets? 2 dogs and 2 cats
11. Do you wear scarves, hats, mittens or ponchos?I wear scarves and mittens.
12. What is/are your favorite item/s to knit?Anything is wonderful right now.
13. What are you knitting right now? Let's see....I am working on a cardigan(Bristow from knitty), a cabled scarf, and a shawl(Cozy from knitty).
14. Do you like to receive handmade gifts? Yes
15. Do you prefer straight or circular needles? Bamboo, aluminum, plastic? I have really have experience with Aluminum. I have two bamboo circulars but haven't figured out how to make them work for me.
16. Do you own a yarn winder and/or swift? NO
17. How did you learn to knit? I taught myself.
18. How old is your oldest UFO? A cabled scarf that I started in Dec 2005
19. What is your favorite holiday? I like all the holidays
20. Is there anything that you collect? Yarn and scrapbook supplies
21. Any books, yarns, needles or patterns out there you are dying to get your hands on?I would like the yarn harlot books and a cable book by Fiona Ellis. What knitting magazine subscriptions do you have? I only subscribe to Interweave Knits
22. Are there any new techniques you'd like to learn? I am learning cables and lace.
23. Are you a sock knitter? Trying to learn that too What are your foot measurements? circumference=10 inches....Length 9.5 inches
24. When is your birthday? (01/18)
2. What do you use to store your needles/hooks in? I use my mother's old knitting case. It looks like a bottle container .
3. How long have you been knitting? I have only been knitting a little over the year. Would you consider your skill level to be beginner, intermediate or advanced? I am a beginner but I will try anything.
4. Do you have an Amazon or other online wish list? http://www.amazon.com/gp/registry/wishlist/ref=yourlists_pop_1/102-7439220-0178514
5. What's your favorite scent? (for candles, bath products etc.) I love anything citrusy. My two favorites are cucumber melon and pink grapefruit.
6. Do you have a sweet tooth?Yes... Favorite candy? Caramel or toffee anything with those two things in them are my faves.
7. What other crafts or Do-It-Yourself things do you like to do?I also scrapbook and make cards. Do you spin? Yes, I am learning to spin with a spindle.
8. What kind of music do you like?I like anything except rap. Can your computer/stereo play MP3s? (if your buddy wants to make you a CD) Yes my music devices with play anything.
9. What's your favorite color? I don't really have a favorite color
Or--do you have a color family/season/palette you prefer? I tend to like any blues or greens or pinks.Any colors you just can't stand? no
10. What is your family situation?I am married and have 3 kids (dd-14, ds -11, ds-3) Do you have any pets? 2 dogs and 2 cats
11. Do you wear scarves, hats, mittens or ponchos?I wear scarves and mittens.
12. What is/are your favorite item/s to knit?Anything is wonderful right now.
13. What are you knitting right now? Let's see....I am working on a cardigan(Bristow from knitty), a cabled scarf, and a shawl(Cozy from knitty).
14. Do you like to receive handmade gifts? Yes
15. Do you prefer straight or circular needles? Bamboo, aluminum, plastic? I have really have experience with Aluminum. I have two bamboo circulars but haven't figured out how to make them work for me.
16. Do you own a yarn winder and/or swift? NO
17. How did you learn to knit? I taught myself.
18. How old is your oldest UFO? A cabled scarf that I started in Dec 2005
19. What is your favorite holiday? I like all the holidays
20. Is there anything that you collect? Yarn and scrapbook supplies
21. Any books, yarns, needles or patterns out there you are dying to get your hands on?I would like the yarn harlot books and a cable book by Fiona Ellis. What knitting magazine subscriptions do you have? I only subscribe to Interweave Knits
22. Are there any new techniques you'd like to learn? I am learning cables and lace.
23. Are you a sock knitter? Trying to learn that too What are your foot measurements? circumference=10 inches....Length 9.5 inches
24. When is your birthday? (01/18)
Monday, May 01, 2006
Sunday Scribbles
I live where I live because I love the country and the peace and quiet that it brings. I love the old farm house we live in. It has big open rooms and lots of light. I grew up on the shores of Lake Erie and now I live on the shores of grains and all things living. It is very peaceful and safe. I am far from my family which is a good thing I think. I love my family but I like that they have to make an effort to drop by. My dh and I found the house of our dreams in the place of our dreams.
Blog a book along: parenting
Chapter 1:
What I thought about it? Obviously, I don't know a true no limit person. I do try to have some of the things that he says make one a no limit person. I try to have self respect and self confidence even though there are days when that isn't too forth coming. I also liked the idea of affective domain. I agree that the schools are more interested in what you know rather than how you feel. My ds has an anxiety problem that manifests itself at school. Every where else he is fine. But in school he feels pressured which results in feeling of inadequacies etc.. We are working on it but it is a long hard road. So I do monitor how and what I say to him because he takes everything very seriously and internalizes it. I always try to put the positive spin on things. I don't like the idea of perfect creation. No one is perfect. I think perfectionism is the root of all that is bad. I usually do tell my children that I love them for themselves not what they do or what they will do. I tell them I hope that they think of others as well as themselves. I also believe that the kids know what they might want to be when they grow up. I have never said you have to be "blah". I am actually very surprised what my children say interests them. One wants to be a sports therapist(physical therapy) and one wants to be a librarian. I feel that it is very important to be examples for our children but I think most of us know this. So not too much new for me in this chapter.
What I thought about it? Obviously, I don't know a true no limit person. I do try to have some of the things that he says make one a no limit person. I try to have self respect and self confidence even though there are days when that isn't too forth coming. I also liked the idea of affective domain. I agree that the schools are more interested in what you know rather than how you feel. My ds has an anxiety problem that manifests itself at school. Every where else he is fine. But in school he feels pressured which results in feeling of inadequacies etc.. We are working on it but it is a long hard road. So I do monitor how and what I say to him because he takes everything very seriously and internalizes it. I always try to put the positive spin on things. I don't like the idea of perfect creation. No one is perfect. I think perfectionism is the root of all that is bad. I usually do tell my children that I love them for themselves not what they do or what they will do. I tell them I hope that they think of others as well as themselves. I also believe that the kids know what they might want to be when they grow up. I have never said you have to be "blah". I am actually very surprised what my children say interests them. One wants to be a sports therapist(physical therapy) and one wants to be a librarian. I feel that it is very important to be examples for our children but I think most of us know this. So not too much new for me in this chapter.
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