I am going to answer one of the writing prompts...Do I grow up in an anxiety rich environment? How did it affect me as a kid?
Yes, I did grow up in an anxiety rich environment because when I was 9 years old my world changed. My mother who was my world at the time had an aneryseum that left her alive but partial paralyzed and having to learn everything all over again. I also ended up sick with scarletina and very scared that nothing would ever be the same. All of a sudden my rock wasn't there. My siblings were all a lot older than me and had lives of their own. My father was there but he had my mother to take care of...so there was a lot of anxiety in my home for a lot of years as we adjusted to the changes. I ended up taking care of my parents by the time I was ten. I did the laundry, cooking, and cleaning etc. I don't know what a normal childhood is like because I didn't really have one. I learned more about pharmacology than most adults. Needless to say I had a lot of responsiblity and some say in the household but I still needed some direction and guidance. My father had did the best he could but he also helped me to see that I could do anything as long as I wanted it badly enough.
I learned thru my experiences what I don't want for my children but also learned coping mechanisms to deal with my life without pills or drugs. I have learned mediation as a way to relieve stress and worries. I know my signals that I need to release things. My dh has learned various things thru his life as well and we have practiced them together. We try to have a peaceful household but fun and loving household as well. I don't want to a friend to children I want to be a guide and sounding board. These are things that I always wanted with my parents. I don't like feeling anxious so I have worked to change that. I know some people don't have that luxury of having time to deal with their anxieties but I know once they deal with them, They function better. I think Dyer is not realizing that not all children are totally accepting and free from anxiety. My son has always been anxious and nervous since he was small. My dh and I have shared with him our ways of coping and encouraged him to find his own peace with himself. Sometimes this works and sometimes it doesn't but we do try to him figure out why he worries and if it is something he can change to feel in control of it.
I also think there is a fine line between worry and concern....I call it worry but maybe it is concern....I worry that my kids as they find their independence they are not harmed badly...I worry that my husband's health doesn't get worse or that he has an accident....I think these things are some things I can not change but I still worry because I love them and don't want to lose them to something that we could have prepared for. So worry or concern.....where is the line and do we know if we cross it?
Wednesday, June 14, 2006
Saturday, June 10, 2006
Here are things my secret pal sent me. The yarn is sock yarn and I can't wait to try socks. I might have to take a little while before I do but I will learn to do socks.....
The book is really good. I already finished it. But will probably read it again and again. My secret pal is treating me well.
The knitting is going okay right now. I figured out my left front on my cardigan and that is coming along. I haven't made much progress on anything else because I am working on my paper craft hobby. I am going to do some selling at a craft fair in July so I am busy making things to sell. Plus the kids have been busy as well.
Now that has cooled off...I will be able to make better progress. It has been so hot here and we don't have A/C so it hard to keep the house cool and comfy.
I will try to update about the book in the next few days. I haven't read the last two chapters so will skim those and come up with something tomorrow or Monday.