Tuesday, December 20, 2005
I am having such a hard time with getting into the holiday mood. I just feel stressed and blue, I guess. We have to scrap together money for presents and I don't feel like making cookies. I guess it is to be expected in that this is the first Christmas without my mom and his dad. Even though we weren't home for Christmas it was always nice to talk to them hear about their day. I know I often think about talking to my mom but know that she isn't there any more is sometimes really hard to bear. I guess I took for granted that she would always be there. Being able to call about this receipe or that....or any stories of Christmas' past. I am glad that my Dad is with my sister, Beckie for the holidays anyway. At least, he will have a change of scenery. For some reason I am really missing family this year. We have always stayed here and I have enjoyed it but this year is really hard. Hopefully, once we finish shopping and have some cookies made I will feel better.